ISSUE #4 [26/6]

Francis said we should alternate writing issues of the newsletter, apparently because he needs to lighten his workload. But he comes in at 10 a.m. and leaves at 5 p.m. every day. Firstly I felt I should expand on what he said in the last issue. In the last three weeks we’ve received a massive number of applications for Phase Two of Experiment 959. To those who have signed up so far, thank you. You are bringing us closer and closer to the goal of making this world a better place. To those who have yet to sign up, I urge you to do so - if not for the altruistic elements, then at least for the allure of going to the future for a week. Going through the reports by our various departments I am heartened to see that excellent progress has been made to ensure that Phase Two proceeds smoothly. Our resource management department recently reported an 80 per cent surplus on the equipment needed for Phase Two. The operations department has (kinda) already completed its five-day plan for Phase Two, and assures me that we will complete our objectives with time to spare. Our business development team has ensured smooth cash flow into Experiment 959 processes, ensuring that we do not compromise on safety or quality, and finally our marketing team has launched a comprehensive campaign to gather participants for Phase Two. I am more than satisfied with their work. There is also the executive committee, consisting of Francis and I along with our Secretary and Chief Financial Officer. The two of them have been instrumental in making sure things get done, and quickly. Francis and I agreed that we should recognise the efforts of our major departments, and so the marketing campaign might include some promotional material soon. And not to mention - we have hundreds of hard-working and talented researchers under the main committee that we handpicked from various disciplines. They are the cream of the crop. It is rather a pity that we can only afford to include twenty-four of them in Phase Two, but these researchers have been selected with care and are the best at what they do - and that is absolutely what we need for Phase Two to succeed. I must go, Francis has been calling for me to give him a shoulder massage. I NEED TO PUT HIM IN HIS PLACE.

- Claudia